UGH, Now this week is crazy and it hurts bad

I'm shaking my head at the opening line of my last weeks post. the one i wrote 36 hours ago. Fuck i hate how life can just sweep in and change everything. everything. And why does it keep happening to me. I'm getting really tired of waking up. Seems I'm either on top of the world or in the worst possible situations feeling awefull. I wish this crazy life of mine would just balance out. give me some peace.


when the hour is upon us.
and when our beauty surely gone.
no you will not be forgotten.
and you will not be alone.
no you will not be alone.
- thanks rob t, IL put my faith in that. for it is all i have left to give.

Folsom Street Fair 2006

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I QUIT SMOKING, A letter to my old friend

Dear Marlboro man,

Goodbye my friend. You know I'm not a quit-er, but you just had to go. i was growing old of your awful smell. my teeth are about to jump ship in protest. As for my lungs, well they went on strike years ago. Sorry kid your just not worth it anymore. you still are very very sexy, and i know it will be hard not to put you in my mouth, but i have to. I'm getting to old for your bullshit. It is bitter sweet as you are one of my last imperfections. So FUCK OFF! Go annoy someone else for a change. I will even drop you off at a near by high school if you'd like. I'll keep the fond memories but nothing else please. Please take all your shit with you.

Thanks
L


now where did i put that brownie? HMMM

Burning Man 2006

Whew! What a Trip!
Drama Sex Injuries Art Intoxication

that is if i had to fit my experience into five words. but i don't, hold on its a helluva story.

So every year my best friend and i go camping at an event called Burning Man. we have been going there for over four years now. Burning Man takes place on the Black Rock Desert in northern Nevada. a incredible desolate and remote canvas is the stage to an amazing experience year after year. This year however was much much less peaceful and more dramatic.

This year we decided it would be fun to pull our burner friends together. some of which include a porn star (me), a law student, a crystal addicted former lawyer, and his trick, my roommate's ex-boyfriend, and his crack addicted friend, a DJ, a boring wanna be model, and a few others in between. as well as a group of 30 or so from new zealand who where just using our extra reserved space. So yeah, a big fucking mess. Why on earth did i ever think that a group like that could ever be respectful of one another enough to get through 9 days in one of the most harsh environments in north America. Well we went anyways.

Lets start with the GOOD:
ME: so i decided that i would design and build a shade structure or our group. Brilliant! yes indeed. the structure worked perfectly and even had a few unexpected benefits. See below of my design drawings. I also was supper excited to get a Mohawk. i have wanted to get one for years, and I've always worked into too conservative environment to do it. But this year FUCK-EM. i can get a new damn job with my new fantastic hair.

SEX: ahh god i love sex. i wish it was the only thing i knew how to do. I hooked up with about 5 guys throughout the week. Compared to 9 days in the default world that would be a slow week. But it was great. Sex is so much more amazing out there. One guy in particular was a lot of fun to be with. Michael came with his friend steve from Portland. When they arrived and he stepped out of the car i knew i was in trouble. it was my understanding that this boy he brought was for him. All i could think about at that time was how i was going to have to try and keep my horny hands off of him. He is supper hot. Here is a few pics i stole from his myspace. YUMM LICK!



















Although extraordinary hot and our sexual energy was on fire, i sure am glad that's all over with. we was a bit of a party boy, and me wanting nothing to do with party drugs anymore, it got a little frustrating. i absolutely hate it when i see a beautiful guy that is way too cracked out. Pisses me off to no end. Well we had our fun a few times. in-fact the first time we hooked up, we went all the way out to the perimeter fence mid afternoon. and that ended up being the first time he has hooked up outdoors. So of course i made sure the next time we were outside again. Yup right there laying on the hammock. HOT! HOT! HOT! god damn. So as the week comes to a close. "Apparently" as i heard second hand. Steve the guy who brought him flipped out in front of everyone, pissed off that he was spending all his time with me and not him. UGH! whatever.
Other sex encounters included a aged Dom guy. a hot burner boy, and i don't really remember what the other guys where all about.

ART: the art this year was amazing. my favorite has to be the Belgian waffle and the flaming lotus girls.

INTOXICATION: wow, so i remember most nights, not all of them. since all i have left to party with these days is a little booze, whip its, and pot i certainly took them to the extreme while there. I am quite proud of myself though. i was offered countless times many various substances and i still was good. huh i guess that phase in my life really is over.

BAD:

INJURIES: Well with 5 of our camp-mates getting injured, it sure was a lot of fun. Wow from a girl falling off our bike ramp and scaring her face and breast, to severe arm injuries, to a tweak-er running into a coat rack and nearly taking out his eye. Our camp was full of injuries. we even had a white board up listing all of our camp injuries and at the bottom: "5 hours since last injury". i even had a bit of a scare when i ate some pancakes tainted with oranges, as i am hyper allergic to oranges. As well as a severe tooth ace. So yes we had a lot of trips to the medical tent.

DRAMA: I am an idiot. yes i am. i knew when i was leaving for our trip that it was going to be a big mess, and I still went. Prior to the trip our group basically took sides in a huge battle over respect for our camp mates. and it just escalated on the playa. although most everyone else's drama quited down significantly, mine went through the roof. As previously mentioned i apparently stole this guys trick. I also had an awe full run-in at the sex club Jiffy Lube. this guy started calling me a racist and asshole because i would not let him suck my dick. He was annoying, why on earth would i encourage him to be around me. so i was a dick when he kept trying to talk to me while we where in the sex club. which if you have never been, is very bad sex club edicate. So he starts a yellin. ugh. in the end i told him to fuck off that i have probably had sex with more black guys than the number of times he has touched his own dick. None the less he still with all his ranting and yelling was unable to keep me from hooking up with someone. FUCK OFF DUMBASS! Yet there is more. Jason the ex-boyfriend of my roommate (female). What a fucking selfish son of a bitch. I know i am very narcissistic and self centered but this guy blew me out of the fucking water. wow! i have never experienced someone so selfish. So of course we went to blows, and one time almost physically. I'm not one to physically fight someone, but he sure did get me stirring.

I'm sure that after i decompress the negative memories will fade faster than the good ones.

Overall it was certainly another life changing experience. although isn't everything life changing.

Here are a few more pics